so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
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