Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Randomize
