They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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