That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
How does it feel to date your dad?
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
