i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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