Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
Randomize
