eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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