this boner is exhausting
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Randomize
