Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
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