HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
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I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
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So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
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