somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
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