All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
