the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Randomize
