Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
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