would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
