Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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