Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
Randomize