I think I died a long time ago.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
