yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Let's paint friendship bongs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
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