my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
it was like eating out sand paper
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
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