WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Randomize