listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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