We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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