Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
Well my cheeks are red now
good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
17 Women That Lost Condoms Up Their Lady Parts
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
23 People Confess The Most F*cked Up Thing Guests Have Done In Their House
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?