I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
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