tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Randomize
