You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
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