I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Randomize
