He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
