I puked a lego.
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
