S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
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