Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Randomize
