So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
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