i permit you to call me
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
My feet surprised me
Randomize