We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
