Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Randomize
