so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
they're like a gay fantastic four
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Randomize
