OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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