: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
her facebook's as public as her vagina
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
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