We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Randomize
