remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
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