Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
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