you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Randomize