I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize