On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
