I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
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