Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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