Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
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