they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize
