you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
we should paint friendship bongs
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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