More tranny stories later!
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
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